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The Unluckiest AND Luckiest Day of My Life

March 12 2012 By melbournemamma 33 Comments

Please note: all accounts of this day are not mine but are from those who were there on the day – my partner “A” (who is now my husband), doctors, police & emergency workers. I have no memory of this day or the days following.

Here is my story…..

My week had gotten off to a great start – I had just spent a fabulous long weekend in Lorne relaxing with A and I was on my way to work at my new job in the city,  that I had started the previous month.

As I sat stationary in my car at a red light on a freeway off ramp, I was rear ended by a drunk (*asshole*) driver travelling at approx 80-100km/h, who was heading home (at 8.00am) from a big night in the city.

My car was pushed into the car in front of me and was then launched (apparently airborne and flipped 180 degrees) into oncoming traffic. Another car travelling in the opposite direction then t-boned my car on the passenger side. Police later told us that witnesses said my car looked like it was bouncing around in a pinball machine.

When paramedics arrived, I was unconscious. I remained unconscious as they cut me from the car and transported me to hospital. Years later I spoke with a fireman who attended the scene (he ended up being related to someone I knew), and he still remembered my accident and said that they assumed when they arrived at the accident that they were going to be removing a body – my body – from the wreckage, as it was pretty bad. He told me how surprised they were to discover I was actually still alive. (I felt sick to my stomach when he told me this. I had no idea)

I was then rushed to the hospital, where they discovered I had a broken pelvis, internal bleeding, fractured vertebrae, and head, shoulder and foot injuries. I was pretty beaten up.

Somehow I managed to tell them the name of A’s work (apparently I couldn’t remember his phone number or last name) and they eventually tracked him down to tell him what had happened. I can only imagine how it would feel to receive news like this – especially when he’d only kissed me goodbye a few hours earlier. He then had to call my parents (who lived interstate) and tell them what had happened – he said it was the hardest thing he’s ever had to do.

Apparently when he arrived at the hospital, I was angry and upset because they had cut my clothes off me and I had been wearing my brand new skirt (obviously the bump to my head hadn’t affected my love of fashion) and was not happy about it.

My parents arrived soon after and stayed at my bedside for the remainder of the week.

During that time A and my dad went to the wreckers to collect my belongings from the car. When they arrived, the guys there were avoiding them and acting a little weird until A mentioned that he had just come from the hospital to collect my stuff and they were shocked, as they had assumed that whoever had been in my car had been killed (A assumed this was why they’d been acting a little odd when he got there). My dad took one look at the car and walked out  – A later told me, that my dad threw up when he saw what was left of my car.

The following month in hospital was a blur of pain, rehab and more pain. Lots of people came by to visit, some I remember, others I don’t. I hated being in the hospital and couldn’t wait to get home.

I haven’t included any pictures of what was left of my car here because some family members and friends have asked never to see them but here’s one of me in the hospital a few days after the accident.

lucky to be alive

One of the hardest things for me following the accident was relearning how to walk.

It’s strange as an adult having to learn such a basic task – something that we do every single day without thought. One of my therapists told me that learning to walk as an adult is the most difficult thing a person can do. Even though it had only been a couple of weeks since I had walked, my body had been through so much trauma and was in so much pain that my brain was not sending the correct signals to my legs. It was so frustrating not even to be able to put one foot in front of the other.

After five weeks in hospital, I returned home in a wheelchair, with a walking frame (my grandma had one the same). I would continue to receive threatment as an outpatient three days per week.

I remember celebrating the day I walked from the front door to the letterbox (approx 15m) – I felt like I had run a marathon – even though I had used the frame. I soon graduated to a walking stick (which made me really self-conscious – why was everyone staring at me?) and I used that for another couple of years.

It was nearly four years before I began to walk “normally” – ie without a limp. I had walked for so long with a limp that my brain thought that was my normal walk and even when then pain lessened, I still walked the same way. It took lots of rehab and walking in front of a mirror (for months and months), to retrain my brain into allowing me walking normally.

For the next few years I regularly attended rehab and a pain management program and had counselling as I became depressed and wasn’t coping very well with the pain, and how much my life had changed and the effect it had on my personal and professional life.

It took awhile for me to realise how lucky I was to have survived that day and that my injuries could have been a lot worse.

I was so fortunate to have such a wonderful and caring partner and be surrounded by family and friends who loved me. I could not have gotten through this without them.

 I still have days where the pain is more than I can bear and I get angry and think “why me?”. But then I think about what could have been and realise, I am the LUCKIEST person in the world.

Filed Under: Me, Migraines Tagged With: melbourne mamma, migraines

« Where A “Mamma” Goes!
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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Thetis Sardo

    March 12 2012 at 12:54 pm

    Hi Tracey,

    WOW! What a story, I couldnt helop but shed tears reading it.
    I can’t believe how much you have now achieved after all that. You are so brave and yes very lucky to be alive. I am so glad to see you doing something you love and succeeding at that. I wish you all the very best and thank you for sharing. It certainly puts things into perspective.

    xxx

    Thetis

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      March 12 2012 at 1:17 pm

      thanks thetis, i’ve been pretty emotional today and was a mess writing that post. i’m lucky to have such wonderful family & friends, who have provided me with so much support during the last 10 years x

      Reply
  2. Melissa Nahon

    March 12 2012 at 1:21 pm

    Wow, thank you for sharing your story with us.
    I cannot imagine exactly what you and your family must have gone through but reading your story certaintly made me cry.
    I’m glad to hear your recovery is going well & I’m sorry to hear about all the pain you have endured because of the senseless actions of someone else.
    I wish you all the very best for your future recovery.
    Melissa xxx

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      March 12 2012 at 1:48 pm

      thank you melissa x

      Reply
  3. Julia Mendola

    March 12 2012 at 1:30 pm

    and I am lucky to have met you x

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      March 12 2012 at 1:48 pm

      thanks julia x

      Reply
  4. Dhea

    March 12 2012 at 8:48 pm

    Tracey thank you for having the courage to “re-live” your life altering accident with us on your anniversary… I can not begin to imagine what you have gone through but I do say that I am blessed to know you and you are an awesome person… keep doing what you do as you are doing really well… your children and your hubby are so blessed to have you as their mummy and wife… as we are to have you as a friend
    your new friend
    Dhea

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      March 13 2012 at 8:49 pm

      thank you dhea, that means a lot to me x

      Reply
  5. Melissa

    March 12 2012 at 8:54 pm

    Wow! What an amazing story, I’m so glad you were OK. Thank you for sharing your story.

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      March 13 2012 at 8:49 pm

      thanks melissa

      Reply
  6. Dorothy @ Singular Insanity

    March 12 2012 at 11:28 pm

    What an amazing story…! I can’t even imagine being through so much physical trauma. I imagine thought that this would have been very hard for you to write…

    You are indeed a very lucky person.. So glad that you have made it through…

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      March 13 2012 at 8:50 pm

      thanks dorothy, it was hard to write & i had an emotional day but all good now 🙂

      Reply
  7. Amber Brodecky

    March 13 2012 at 6:16 pm

    Hi Tracey,

    I have just logged onto this website for the first time to see the upcoming sale, and it was really interesting to find your story here – most unexpected, very moving – and very much like my own story. It has been 13 years for me, but I do remember the 10 year anniversary being quite a milestone. Congratulations and well done!

    I hit a double b truck head-on after losing control of my car at 100km hour. The truck drove over the front and back of my car as it spun around. The only door left was the drivers seat. It is truly a miracle I survived. I broke my neck. The doctors said that 97% of people with my injury die, and of the other 3% they had never seen anyone walk again.

    I wore a halo for 3 months (very barbaric head contraption), and spent many months in hospital. I have been fortunate enough to make a full recovery, aside from the occasional migraine. While this is one of the most traumatic things I have ever been through in my life, it is also one of the most profound. It has changed my life in so many ways for the better. Most of all I am grateful, for having healthy body, people who love me, and a second chance at life. It has spurred me on to try harder, to look deeper, and to appreciate even the small and seemingly insignificant moments. The best things in life are truly free.

    It is fantastic to see you have obviously gone on to be successful at what you are doing and are passionate about life. Not everyone is able to recover in that way. Thanks for sharing your story. It was really moving to hear of someone who had shared such a similar journey, which is so unique, and is of course the thing that you think ‘will never happen to you’.

    Amber

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      March 13 2012 at 8:56 pm

      hi amber

      welcome to my blog.

      thank you for sharing your story, it sounds like we have a lot in common. so many things i took for granted in the past are now some of the things i value most.

      i also suffer from migraines (up to 5 days a week) as a result of the accident, but have been undergoing botox treatment for the past 6 months and am now only having them one day a week.

      i wish you all the best with your ongoing recovery.

      tracey x

      Reply
  8. Danielle

    March 13 2012 at 9:26 pm

    Tracey,
    I wanted to let you know that I think you are one very lucky and amazing woman. X

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      March 17 2012 at 11:54 pm

      thank you danielle x

      Reply
  9. Alma Griffiths

    March 13 2012 at 9:31 pm

    Tracey, thank you for sharing your story. I always thought there was something special about you and this just proves it. You are an inspiration! I wish you all the best to continue onwards and upwards in your healing. xx

    Reply
  10. Rachel

    March 14 2012 at 2:23 pm

    What an amazing story. And what a strong person to write it.
    I have to admit I did have a cry for you just now.
    xx

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      March 17 2012 at 11:55 pm

      thanks rachel, it was an emotional day when i wrote it, but i’m glad i did

      Reply
  11. Kylie Loy

    March 14 2012 at 7:51 pm

    Whoa what a story, I too was popping on to check time & details for Sunday.
    You are a very lucky lady Tracey the angels were on your side that.
    Thanks for sharing & I hope your recovery is always on the improvement.
    Kylie xx

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      March 17 2012 at 11:55 pm

      thanks kylie, things can only get better (i hope) x

      Reply
  12. Melinda

    March 15 2012 at 11:22 pm

    I am totally speechless after reading your post, and have just shed more than a tear, omgoodness. What an amazing story of strength, courage and of what family/friend support can do and mean. My heart goes out to you and your family for what trauma you have all experienced. xx

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      March 17 2012 at 11:56 pm

      thanks melinda, i’m very lucky to have had such wonderful family & friends by my side

      Reply
  13. Carolyn Beverley

    March 25 2012 at 2:49 pm

    What an increadible story! From a strong and confident woman I met only yesterday. I will never understand why these things happen to good people, bit acts as a timely reminder to enjoy every day we have and not to take things for granted as we all so often do. A lot of people would have let such a trauma take over the rest of their lives, but you have gone out and accomplished so much which I’m sure will only continue. You are an inspiration.

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      April 6 2012 at 11:27 pm

      thanks for your message carolyn. for awhile i did let the trauma take over my life because it was hard to accept that my life was never going to be the same. once i began to accept that i was not going to be the same person & that I was going to have to deal with the pain & limitations for the rest of my life, i realised how lucky i was to have survived.

      Reply
  14. Robyn

    September 21 2012 at 7:53 pm

    Oh my. Tears of fear for you and amazement. You must be one strong willed woman. I understand the car thing. I had an accident in which I had no choice but to run myself into a pole to avoid even more devastating results. I was lucky to walk away without a scratch – but my father and now husband would never let me see the photo’s of my car. I was so lucky and am heartened that you are too. I hope the migraines you now suffer can too be mended.

    Reply
  15. Sam

    November 27 2012 at 7:55 pm

    Amazing on your near full recovery … But I’m sure to be left with migraines is better than missing out on all the wonderful things life has to offer us…it’s crazy to think majority of our normal day things can be altered by other people that do make wrong decisions ..our life is in other people’s hands sometimes and that sucks….but this outcome it was your time to stay ….wonderful cos I like what you r doing with your markets all the best Sam 😉

    Reply
  16. Peta

    November 28 2012 at 11:03 am

    Hi Tracey
    What a truly inspirational story….you’ve done
    Amazing and I admire you for this. What a story!
    I suffered a stroke in 08′ as a result of migraines and
    Brought on by a neck manipulation. I had to learn to walk again
    And focus etc…..I made a full recovery with just ongoing migraines too.
    Some don’t and end up in wheelchairs. I was a lucky one….and I had 2 children at the time. You’ve made me feel that I’m not so alone in this world and that I’m very lucky indeed.
    Take care, youre a wonderful person and I wish you luck with your migraines.

    Peta

    Reply
  17. Sarah

    March 12 2013 at 10:53 am

    Our stories have so many similarities.

    I was in a car accident on NYE 1995 aged 20, and although my injuries were not as bad as yours I too fractured a vertebrae and spent time in hospital and rehab learning to walk and move again. Like you I always think of it on its anniversary, another year I may not have had – or at least not have had out of a wheelchair.

    Your post was a timely reminder for me to appreciate everything I have achieved and gained since the accident. Including a husband and two children. I cant imagine what my parents went through getting the call – especially now I am a parent myself (I was living in NT at the time and they were in Adelaide) – they were happily partying away at a NYE party when they got the call at just after midnight. I was in the air by flying doctor between Jabiru and Darwin and no-one could tell them what state I was in.

    Have you read Gill Hicks’ autobiography? It is my ‘grounding’ book whenever I feel sorry for myself and the pain is getting me down. Makes me realise that I am here for a reason and I need to make the most of it.

    Reply
  18. Katrina

    March 12 2013 at 11:11 am

    Holy shit! I wasn’t sure reading this whether I was going to throw up or tear up. I have such a lump in my throat now.

    You are amazing and have so much power to tell us all.

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      March 14 2013 at 4:09 pm

      thank you Katrina, it felt good to put it in words

      Reply
  19. ampa de o'mimi

    March 12 2013 at 7:06 pm

    dear! I discovered you yesterday looking for some inspiration for my new bussiness, a little workshop for childres, and today, I read this moving story, now I’m shocked, I’m now with tears in my eyes in front of my pc in the office and I’m sure that day was the luckiest day of your life! Be sure you’re alive to have this family and to bring us the opportunity of thinking of our future and the things we must do!!!
    thank u so much for your testimony
    from Spain
    ampa azorin

    Reply
    • melbournemamma

      March 14 2013 at 4:08 pm

      thank you for your kind words Ampa x

      Reply

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Tracey  {Melbourne Mamma}
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